When You Make A Mistake

We all mistakes! There isn’t a human being alive who doesn’t – we all do

When You Make A Mistake

Advice from Wendy Smith. Wendy is a Career and Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on life and your career.  You can book a FREE coaching session or find out more at this link

When you make a mistake remember that we all make mistakes! There isn’t a human being alive who hassn’t  – we all do. That is why, when people do work where accuracy is critical, systems are usually put in place to inspect and assure it.  And we make mistakes in all parts of our lives, not just at work.

So, when you make a mistake what do you do next?

Well I think the first big step is to accept you did make a mistake. Most of us are very good at coming up with excuses. Underneath we usually know the truth.

Once you have admitted to yourself what happened, you need to make sure that your mistake causes no further damage. Do whatever you can to put things right or at least make sure that what you did doesn’t cause any further harm. That can be difficult when the mistake is to do with wrong choices in a relationship at home or at work. At times like that it often helps to talk to a friend or to a coach like me.

When you make a mistake putting things right often means being ready to go on record and admit what you did.

Now, if you made a mistake you can put right quickly with no real damage, perhaps you won’t need to tell anyone. But what about the people you who deserve an apology, or those who need to learn from your mistake? Remember hiding a mistake at work that is later discovered is not the best career move.

Being ready to say sorry is really important. A sincere apology for an honest mistake makes a huge difference to the injured party and to your own self-esteem.

Usually, the most important part of handling mistakes is understanding why they happen. Mistakes can occur because you are tired, or perhaps you were distracted. Sometimes it is because you don’t really know what you are doing or because a system or a piece of equipment doesn’t work properly.  All those things can usually be understood easily and put right.

Sometimes, we make mistakes because we are unhappy.

Sometimes, we make mistakes because we are unhappy. We might make bad choices at work or in relationships for reasons deep within us to do with our emotions. And some of us just go on making those kinds of mistakes.

If you keep making the same mistakes, it is a good idea to seek help. There lots of counsellors and coaches around who will be happy to work with you. Take action now, your life is too precious to waste it going round in the same circle.

Career and life coaches like me are around to help you thrive in difficult time, Get in touch at this link – I would like to discuss how I can help.

Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in helping people lead happier lives and feel more fulfilled. She has worked in management as well as coaching and personal development, as well as starting up her own businesses. That means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up a new business or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. 

Need help finding work, with problems at work, at home or with relationships? Book a FREE coaching session with Wendy or find out more at this link

 

Goal Setting

These six steps really do work. And they have worked time and again for some of the most successful people in the world. But you do need to make a commitment and may be this week is the right time to get started.

Goal Setting

Setting Goals for Yourself

Goal setting – lots of people take a little time out on a Sunday evening or Monday morning to review the week ahead. This can be a good time too to review your longer term goals and resolutions. Are they still the right ones to deliver the life you want? Setting, and achieving, your goals is easier if you follow these six steps.

  1. How deeply do you desire the goal? Napoleon Hill, in his landmark book, Think and Grow Rich, said; “The starting point of all achievement is desire. Keep this in mind.  If your desire for your goal weakens you are much less likely to achieve it.” So do you really, really want to achieve that goal?
  2. Can you visualize yourself achieving the goal? Lee Iacocca is one of my heroes and he said “The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.” What will your achievement feel like? How will your life be different when your goal is achieved? If you can really feel that state of being, you are on your way.
  3. Make a plan to follow to accomplish your goal. Make sure it has simple, straight forward action steps to follow. Work out what steps are critical to your success; the important steps needed to make your goal a reality. Guru, Stephen Covey, said, “All things are created twice.”  There needs to be a mental creation first and then a physical creation. You have to make sure that the mental blueprint is what you really want, that you’ve thought everything through. Then each day put the steps in place to make your blueprint a reality. As Stephen Covey also said; “You begin with the end in mind.”
  4. Commit to your goal by putting it on paper. Back to Lee again; “The discipline of writing something down is the first step toward making it happen.” Write down your goal (make it colourful, then the  action steps and what is critical). Writing down the goal, the plan and a timeline actually seems to start things moving. It helps you to be very clear about what you have to do.
  5. Schedule dates for checking your progress in your diary. Regular checks and reviews help to keep you on tack.  Of course you will hit obstacles on the way – plan for them when you can.  And when you can’t plan use your ingenuity to get over or round the block.
  6. If you do get stuck seek support from someone else – a wise friend or colleague.  As you would expect, I’m going to recommend hiring a coach to help you stay on track – holding you to account and helping you overcome obstacles is an important part of what we do.  Don’t let your goal just slide away from you – coaches are good at lifting your motivation, too, by the way.

These six steps really do work. And they have worked time and again for some of the most successful people in the world. But you do need to make a commitment and may be this is the week you start.

Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in management, coaching and personal development. That experience means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up new businesses or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. You can contact her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

Wendy has written a little eBook on how to get on with your boss and a book on job search – you can find her books on Amazon at this link

         

Your Weekly Goal Review – Whither Your Dream?

These six steps really do work. And they have worked time and again for some of the most successful people in the world. But you do need to make a commitment and may be this week is the right time to get started.

Your Weekly Goal Review – Whither Your Dream?

Lots of people take a little time out on a Sunday evening or Monday morning to review the week ahead. This can be a good time too to review your longer term goals and resolutions. Are they still the right ones to deliver the life you want? Setting and achieving your goals are easier if you follow these six steps.

How deeply do you desire the goal? Napoleon Hill, in his landmark book, Think and Grow Rich, said “The starting point of all achievement is desire. Keep this in mind.  If your desire for your goal weakens you are much less likely to achieve it.” So do you really, really want to achieve that goal?

Can you visualize yourself achieving the goal? Lee Iacocca is one of my heroes and he said “The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.” What will your achievement feel like? How will your life be different when your goal is achieved? If you can really feel that state of being, you are on your way.

Make a plan to follow to accomplish your goal. Make sure it has simple, straight forward action steps to follow. Work out what steps are critical to your success; the important steps needed to make your goal a reality. Guru, Stephen Covey, said, “All things are created twice.”  There needs to be a mental creation first and then a physical creation. You have to make sure that the mental blueprint is what you really want, that you’ve thought everything through. Then each day put the steps in place to make your blueprint a reality. As Stephen Covey also said; “You begin with the end in mind.”

Commit to your goal by putting it on paper. Back to Lee again; “The discipline of writing something down is the first step toward making it happen.” Write down your goal (make it colourful, then the  action steps and what is critical). Writing down the goal, the plan and a timeline actually seems to start things moving. It helps you to be very clear about what you have to do.

Schedule dates for checking your progress in your diary. Regular checks and reviews help to keep you on tack.  Of course you will hit obstacles on the way – plan for them when you can.  And when you can’t plan use your ingenuity to get over or round the block.

If you do get stuck seek support from someone else – a wise friend or colleague.  As you would expect, I’m going to recommend hiring a coach to help you stay on track – holding you to account and helping you overcome obstacles is an important part of what we do.  Don’t let your goal just slide away from you – coaches are good at lifting your motivation, too, by the way.

These six steps really do work. And they have worked time and again for some of the most successful people in the world. But you do need to make a commitment and may be this is the week you start.

I wish you, and those close to you, the most wonderful week.

Warm regards
Wendy
wendymason@wisewolfcoaching.com
http://wisewolfcoaching.com



When You Make A Mistake

We all mistakes! There isn’t a human being alive who doesn’t – we all do

When You Make A Mistake

When you make a mistake – well – we all mistakes! There isn’t a human being alive who doesn’t  – we all do. That is why, when people do work where accuracy is critical, systems are usually put in place to inspect and assure it.

We make mistakes in all parts of our lives, not just at work.

So, when you make a mistake, what do you do next?

When you make a mistake the first big step is to accept you made the mistake. Most of us are very good at coming up with excuses. Underneath we usually know the truth.

Once you have admitted to yourself what happened, you need to make sure that your mistake causes no further damage. Do whatever you can to put things right or at least make sure that what you did doesn’t cause any further harm. That can be difficult when the mistake is to do with wrong choices in a relationship at home or at work. At times like that it often helps to talk to a friend or to a coach like me.

Part of putting things right often means being ready to go on record and admit what you did.

Now, if you made a mistake you can put right quickly with no real damage, perhaps you won’t need to tell anyone. But what about the people you who deserve an apology, or those who need to learn from your mistake? Remember hiding a mistake at work that is later discovered is not the best career move.

When you make a mistake, being ready to say sorry is really important. A sincere apology for an honest mistake makes a huge difference to the injured party and to your own self-esteem.

Usually, the most important part of handling mistakes is understanding why they happen. Mistakes can occur because you are tired, or perhaps you were distracted. Sometimes it is because you don’t really know what you are doing or because a system or a piece of equipment doesn’t work properly.  All those things can usually be understood easily and put right.

Sometimes, we make mistakes because we are unhappy. We might make bad choices at work or in relationships for reasons deep within us to do with our emotions. And some of us just go on making those kinds of mistakes.

If you keep making the same mistakes, it is a good idea to seek help. There lots of counsellors and coaches around who will be happy to work with you. Take action now, your life is too precious to waste it going round in the same circle.

If you need support in a particular situation please get in touch.

Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in management, coaching and personal development. That experience means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up new businesses or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. You can contact her at wendy@wisewolfcoaching.com

Wendy has written a little eBook on how to get on with your boss and a book on job search – you can find her books on Amazon at this link

         

Job Search and Motivation – when the motivation vampire strikes!

It is very easy to become depressed when you have been out of work for a long time. Your motivation seems to just drain away and you may feel like you can’t be bothered any more. But there are things that you can do to help!

A screenshot of the 1922 film, Nosferatu. Thou... 

 

 

At last I’ve heard from Dave.  You can find his latest news at this link and it is a sad tale.  Poor June has been in the wars and Dave has done his best to help but all isn’t well.  Apart from anything else I think the motivation vampire has struck.

It is very easy to become depressed when you have been out of work for a long time.  Your motivation seems to just drain away and you may feel you can’t be bothered any more.

You stop expecting to find the right job and begin to wonder if you will get any job at all.

You can feel depressed and hurt that you can no longer support yourself and your family financially in the way that you believe you should! You may feel you are letting people down.  This in turn can lead to stress and anxiety.

So what do you do?  First and foremost, talk to your family about what is happening and share the problems and the responsibilities with them.  I bet they don’t feel half as bad as you think and perhaps they can help share the financial load. Seek help in managing your finances if you need to and talk to your bank before you get into real financial difficulties.
As for motivation, well yes there are things that you can do to help!
  • Make sure you are working to a routine Monday to Friday. Set yourself some working hours and stick to them
  • Dedicate a space in your home to working – even if it is the dining room table make it look different during working hours.  Spend your working time there apart from lunch and coffee breaks
  • Get some time out of the house each day – go for a walk at lunch time – but get out and take some exercise
  • Revise your CV and your marketing material to show any voluntary work you have been doing
  • Do some voluntary work – it will be good for you, them and your CV
  • Set some targets for yourself in terms of networking meetings (coffee meet-ups etc), sending off CVs etc each week and stick to it
  • Share your targets with someone else and give them permission to challenge you about their achievement – they will enjoy helping you.
  • Enquire about local jobhunter clubs and meetups – here is a example if you are London UK based   London Jobhunters Meetup Group

Above all think though your options again – just like Dave you may have a “hobby” skill that could be the basis of a new business and a whole new, and better, way of life! See that old vampire off – somewhere out there is the right future for you!

Wendy Mason works as a Coach, Consultant and Blogger. She works with all kinds of people going through many different kinds of personal and career change, particularly those wanting to increase their confidence.
If you would like to work on developing your own confidence, Wendy has a Learn to Be Confident Program at this link
You can contact Wendy at wendymason@wisewolfcoaching.com  or ring ++44 (0)2084610114

The ability to bounce – coping with life's problems

Coping with life’s problems successfully needs you to have realistic expectations. Psychologists call these expectations, and the judgements you make based on them, ‘appraisals’. Things that happen to us aren’t a problem unless we judge them to

Bouncing Boy
Image via Wikipedia

Losing your job can be a major blow to your self confidence and it can be difficult to bounce back.  This can be much worse if you are someone who has found it difficult to cope with life’s problems in the past

Coping with life’s problems successfully needs you to have realistic expectations. Psychologists call these expectations, and the judgements you make based on them, ‘appraisals’.  Things that happen to us aren’t a problem unless we judge them to be.

Life is never perfect and problems, including losing your job these days, are a part of normal, everyday life. If our judgements (appraisals) are realistic, we’re much better able to deal with them and not let them throw us off-balance.

The appraisals we make come from our belief system. If we hold unrealistic beliefs, then our judgements may not be the best for the situation.

Sometimes we have unrealistic beliefs about what we must or should do.  We want to be “perfect”.  “Everyone must like me “or “I’ve got to be good at everything” for example. If you think about these for a minute, they are irrational beliefs. Who do you know who could really achieve them?

Another approach!

When you are aware of this, it is possible to substitute an irrational judgement with something more positive?

If someone treats you rudely, you could think what a rotten person they are.  Or you could think “See, everyone does dislike me!”  But another view could be.  “I wonder what happened to that person today to make them behave like that?”

But it is important to follow up these ‘primary appraisals’!  We need to ask ourselves afterwards if there’s anything we can do about a particular event that has caused distress – a “secondary appraisal”.

If we feel helpless to change things, or incompetent when facing challenges, then we’re less likely to come up with a suitable way to handle things.

Self-efficacy

People who have a confident belief that the responses they make to life’s challenges have a meaningful effect (self efficacy), are able to face problems with energy!  This means they bounce back easily.

But how do you develop this belief?

Self-efficacy comes from life experiences and being with others who already have the belief. It’s built up over the years by responding to challenges with action, flexibility and persistence.

But how can we increase our self-efficacy?  Well here are some suggestions:

  1. Set some goals for your life. If we don’t have goals, how can we succeed? Set some goals for your life, and give yourself credit when you achieve them.
  2. Make your goals challenging but realistic enough so you’ll be able to reach them. Set some simple goals to start with, that are fairly easy to achieve and then build on them.
  3. Find some good role models. They don’t have to be someone you know, but find someone you admire and you could learn from.
  4. Talk yourself positive. Take time to observe how you think about yourself.  Start praising your success in your own mind and make a decision to stop putting yourself down.  Admit that, like all of us, you have faults and stop belittling yourself for them.  Instead build yourself up for the smallest successes.
  5. Remember it takes energy and effort to succeed.  Be like an athlete, train yourself to win

Support

People with a good support system are more successful at overcoming life’s problems.

Are there people you can count on to listen to you when you need to talk? Can you speak to them frankly, without worrying about what you say? And are there people in your life you can count on to support you in major decisions?

Why not arrange to see old friends and family members.  You will find most people will take an interest in you if you show a real interest in them first.

Don’t wait for things to get better, take the first step – taking action gives us an increased feeling of competence and self-esteem. Taking action raises our self-efficacy!