How to get on with people at work

How to get on with people at work

Advice from Wendy Smith.  Wendy is a  Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on your life including your career.  You can book a FREE coaching session or find out more at this link

How to get on with people at work
Few of us like everyone

How to get on with people at work –  getting on with people is important in all parts of your life. It is very important at work.

One the hardest lessons we have to learn in life, is that we will meet people who don’t like us. Sometimes this will be for reasons that we understand.  But sometimes, it won’t! And, of course, sometimes we may find ourselves not liking someone and it may be very hard to know why.

How we respond depends very much on the circumstances.

For example, imagine yourself sitting next to someone on a plane for a journey that lasts an hour. It make very little difference whether you like each other or not.  Very soon you will part, never to meet again. But, suppose the person you can’t get on with has a much more significant role in in your life. Suppose the person you are having difficulties with is your new boss, a colleague or an employee. Not knowing how to get on with people at work matters. It matters a lot! So what can you do about it?

How to get on with people at work

First, if you are dealing with your own feelings of dislike, try to work out why you feel like that.  What is it about this person that you find so difficult?  Take some time to think about the issue.  Is it how they look? Is it something they have said or done? Sometimes, we dislike those who remind us of people or experiences in our own past. Take time to reflect and then be completely honest with yourself. Honesty with yourself really matters here.

If you have a sense of mistrust, then try to work out why? Is there any evidence to support how you feel?

Be very honest about your own prejudices. If the way you feel is about their race, their age or their sexual persuasion or their disability, then you have some hard work to do. This problem is yours to resolve, not theirs, and you cannot ignore it!

When you have feelings of dislike, start to work on valuing the individual and the contribution they make. Think about the good things about them. There will be something if you look hard enough.

If the issue is to do with your bad memories, then don’t be afraid to seek the help of a coach or counsellor. If the real problem is your own prejudice then again seek out support from a trainer or coach. Be honest and brave enough to seek help. You will lead a much happier and more fulfilling life without that issue.

If someone dislikes you, then again, see if you can work out why. Try to put things right. How much impact they have on you depends on their role in your life.

When the problem is the boss

If the person is the boss, for example, a new boss; you may have to take your confidence in both hands and start a discussion. Be prepared to hear some criticism and respond positively to it.  Try to make sure the boss really does understand how you are contributing to the work. Then work hard to turn yourself into an asset – share you knowledge with your boss.

Above all, keep the lines of communication open.  Never fight with the boss!  Find the middle ground. At the end of the day, though, if you really can’t get on, consider a move. Fighting the boss is rarely successful and generally leads to misery.

How to get on with people at work – is the problem a colleague?

If the problem is with a colleague or an employee,again work hard to find out why you don’t get on. Talk to them and try to get to know them better. Then find the middle ground. Be scrupulously fair in your dealings with them. At the end of the day, have a professional approach and focus on the work. That way you should be able to find a way to work together even though you may not be best buddies.

How to get on with people at work – you don’t owe those you work with undying affection. Nor do they owe that to you.  But you do owe them a fair chance to do their work well and a fair hearing if they have a problem.  You should be able to expect the same in return.

If you need advice on a relationship at home or at work, then get in touch with me. I can help.

Wendy Smith is a  Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on your life including your career. She helps people lead happier lives and feel more fulfilled. Need help finding work, with problems at work, at home or with relationships? Book a FREE coaching session with Wendy or find out more at this link

Personality Tests – Free Test 

Personality Tests – Free Test 

Advice from Wendy Smith.  Wendy is a  Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on your life including your career.  You can book a FREE coaching session or find out more at this link

Personality tests – a personality test is a questionnaire or other test designed to reveal aspects of your character or psychological makeup. They are used  by recruiters and by large organizations when making decisions about who to or to choose or promote. But you can use these kind of tests yourself. You can do this as part of your own career development. And it always helps to know what recruiters may find.

The first personality tests were developed in 1920s and used by the armed forces. Since these early efforts, a variety of tests have been developed. Most notable are the Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), the MMPI, and a number of tests based on the “Five Factor” Model of personality.

Today, personality tests have become a multi-million dollar industry and they can be used in a range of contexts. These can include individual and relationship counselling as well as career planning, and employee selection and development.

Below is a link to a free test is based on MBTI approach to personality. Upon completion of the questionnaire, you can find out your 4-letter type formula according to Carl Jung’s and Isabel Briggs Myers’ theories.  As well as that, you will find an indication of the strengths of your preferences and the description of your personality type.

After that, if you put your 4 letter type into a search engine you should find lots of relevant information and resources on-line. For example, I am INFJ which suggests among other things an aptitude for writing and counselling/coaching apparently. 

Anyway try the test and if you would like to discuss your results please get in touch. Here is the link http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp  
If you need advice on a relationship at home or at work, then get in touch with me. I can help.

Wendy Smith is a  Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on your life including your career. She helps people lead happier lives and feel more fulfilled. Need help finding work, with problems at work, at home or with relationships? Book a FREE coaching session with Wendy or find out more at this link

Panic at work – When Panic Becomes the Norm at Work!

Panic at work – When Panic Becomes the Norm at Work!

Advice from Wendy Smith. Wendy is a Career and Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on life and your career. She is the author of The WiseWolf Job Search Pocket Book – find Wendy’s books on Amazon 

Panic at work –  a few years ago I worked for an organization where panic was the cultural norm. This meant that if people were not running round the corridors screaming at each other about what needed to be done, the boss thought something was wrong. It was as if he assumed we were all too stupid to understand the priorities or we were just plain lazy.

That panic at work culture led to lots of unhappiness and a significant amount of bullying. On top of that, the quality of the work delivered was never better than just good enough and often not that. Given this was a finance section responsible in those days for overseeing huge budgets, the results were pretty disastrous. People were made illby the stress.

I went into the section with a reputation as a good manager. But I lacked the confidence necessary to hold out against the culture. By the end of six months, I was panicking and shouting at people too.

One day the consequences were brought home to me in a way that is still painful to remember. At a performance review, a member of my team had the courage to tell me the effects the bad behaviour was having on him. I have never felt more ashamed.

Panic at work – changing the culture needs confidence

His courage gave me the confidence to face my manager about the climate at work. He didn’t like hearing it and he didn’t want to change. In the end, and with threats of my moving on, he agreed to try another way. It wasn’t easy for him but he made the effort. And we were lucky that the team gave us the benefit of the doubt and were willing to work with us. The results were impressive and we never went back to “running round like headless chickens”.

Perhaps you work in an organization that hasn’t learned the same lesson. What is it like to work there and what is the effect on you and your own standards? Don’t wait as long as I did to accept that change is needed. Do what you can to bring about that change.

If you can’t bring about change, consider moving on. Do you really want to share responsibility for the harm it is causing you and the people round you?

If you need help to bringing harmony back to your life at work, please get in touch.

Wendy Smith, Career Coach and Life Coach

Wendy Smith is a Career Coach and Life Coach helping you find fresh perspectives on life and your career. Need help finding work, with problems at work, at home or with relationships? Book your free 30 minute, no obligation, trial coaching session with Wendy Smith now at this Link

Resources to help your job search

In the job market, there are always lots of useful techniques to learn or to refresh. From writing a modern CV to wooing at the interview, you’ll find lots of tips in my handy little pocket-book.

Panic at work

A concise and practical little workbook. For all who have the courage to go out and learn the new skills necessary to find a job now.

A concise and practical little work book, it is for all who have the courage to go out and learn the new skills necessary to find a job now.

Find this and my other books on my Amazon page at this link; http://ow.ly/BRSAL