Your Job Search – Dealing With Disappointment
Sadly, disappointments are a fact of life and certainly in the world of job search. Learning how to deal with them and to bounce back is a key factor in eventually achieving success.
When we are disappointed most of us feel a complex set of emotions; anger, hurt, sadness, and often and for no good reason, shame. Unless you can move on from feeling these kind of emotions, they can eat away at you self-confidence!
Some people just seem to have the gift of a quick recovery, others don’t! If you find recovery from disappointment difficult, here are some steps you can take.
Stop trying to fight it
The most important step forward you can make is to accept how you feel and allow yourself to fully experience it. Recognize that after suffering a loss – like not getting that job you had worked so hard on – it is legitimate to grieve and feel some pain. No, I’m not suggesting that you spends days in the pit of despair but you are allowed to feel something – sit with the emotion. Heaven protect us from people who don’t have the gift of feeling their emotions
Work on seeing the broader picture
Now that you are giving yourself time to feel, you can begin to see the wider picture. You can begin to see what just happened in a different way. You can begin to recognize that in today’s job market there is an element of lottery. There could be lots of reasons why you didn’t get this particular job and you do need to find out why. But not getting that job doesn’t mean you are not a good candidate and there lots of other good jobs out there.
Make changes but stay with your own values
There will be lessons to learn from this experience and probably things to be incorporated in your future job search but stay with your own values. Don’t compromise something important to you, just because it didn’t fit in with what one particular organization wanted. You can turn that on its head and keep in mind that if getting that job meant that kind of compromise, then perhaps that wasn’t the organization to join anyway.
Practice acceptance and move on.
Even though we know that some things are bound to happen sometimes, we’re not always willing to accept them. And this is certainly true when it comes to job search. But unfortunately being disappointed is part of life and certainly part of job search. The secret of success is not avoiding disappointment or failure – it is about knowing how to recover, learn from the experience and move on. So, when you are ready, take a deep breath, remember how good you are and get out there again.
But if you do feel yourself getting stuck or going further down, seek help. Career coaches and counsellors are there to help you. And I am always very happy to talk to you – get in touch.
Wendy Smith is a career consultant, life coach and business coach with depth of experience in management, coaching and personal development. That experience means she is equally at home helping clients find a new career direction, starting-up new businesses or dealing with life’s more challenging personal issues. You can contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org
Wendy has written a little eBook on how to get on with your boss and a book on job search – you can find her books on Amazon at this link